I'm Completely Normal

Question:

At least that's what it seems. But no one's with me behind closed doors. My friends do the same thing- not eating or throwing up. Can you help me get a better diet plan started? Do you know what could be causing this in me? I have no problems with my family or friends so I'm really confused about why this is happening. Thanks for your time.

Answer:

I am glad you are asking yourself whether you have anorexia. If you are hiding your eating behaviors behind closed doors, not eating and/or throwing up, it sounds as though you have, or are developing a serious eating disorder.

Take our quiz, Do You Have a Healthy Relationship With Food? and think of someone you can trust to talk to honestly about these issues. Your physician, a teacher or relative can help you evaluate your situation and identify resources to address your needs. One of the things that may be useful is working with a nutritionist experienced in treating eating disorders. You could learn about your nutritional needs and develop a meal plan that supports your lifestyle.

The question of why you may have gotten involved with an eating disorder is personal and individual and important to pursue. People with eating disorders, especially anorexia, often assert that they are completely normal and have no problems. This in itself is something of a contradiction as it is completely normal to have some problems. A need to be super-normal or perfect is characteristic of anorexia. Your description of yourself as "everybody's friend" may be related to this. Is it realistic to be friends with everyone? What aspects of your true feelings or true self are sacrificed when you try to fulfill this role? Where do they go?

I recommend that you continue the exploration of your confusion about your eating problems and their origins with a psychotherapist who specializes in eating disorders. You can search for someone in your area by using one of these links: American Anorexia Bulimia Association, Inc., Treatment Locator, Eating Disorders Awareness and Prevention and Find a Therapist. You deserve the help you need to learn to be a true friend to your own body.