Not Ready for a Bathing Suit

Question:

i'm 14 and i don't want to step into a bathing suit untill i lose some weight, ive tried starving myself, but i cont. to eat, i'm only 115,but it looks as if i weigh maybe 150lbs. please help me. i don't want to say anything to my parents either.
thanks

Answer:

You are not alone in struggling with feelings about wearing a bathing suit. For many people, especially women, the thought of "bathing suit season" brings on anguish over body image -negative judgements based on the differences between the body one has and the bodies one sees in fashion advertisements, and feelings of pressure, anxiety and depression. Sometimes these kinds of feelings can lead to eating disordered thoughts and behaviors.

Starving yourself is unhealthy and can lead to the development of an eating disorder. Another symptom of an eating disorder is distorted perception of body size. It sounds as though your anxiety and/or frustration about how you will look and feel in a bathing suit may be causing you to think that you look as though you weigh 30% more than you actually do.

I don't know why your concerns about wearing a bathing suit are so intense that your perceptions have become distorted and you have tried to starve yourself. It seems like you do need help to get some perspective on your body and to understand whatever other issues or feelings in your life are making you feel so uncomfortable with yourself. If your parents are not good resources for you right now, I suggest that you think of another adult whom you trust, perhaps another relative, or a teacher, school nurse or counselor, or your doctor. You may even want to work with a therapist.

You and your feelings about yourself are important. Please do continue to reach out for help so that you can enjoy being you.