I Think I Am Fat

Question:

I eat almost all non fat free foods and try to stay clear of too many calories. I exercise as much as I can. I read about different exercises you can do for the problem areas (like for me, the thighs and butt area) and I do videos. But I can't stop this obsession I still want to lose weight, I don't even think I have lost anything and I have been watching what I eat for a while now. My mom and my friends say I don't need to be on a diet. They say I have gone too far with this. I know that I am not fat! But I also know that I can lose extra fat especially in the problem areas. Just enough so I can look in the mirror and not see fat legs and so I can be able to wear shorts and bathing suits. I don't know what I am doing wrong, I just can't lose weight. Sometimes when I look at myself it looks like I gained more weight than when I started. Could that be possible? My mom also says that I am not eating healthly because I refuse to eat a hamburger or any red meat now, I will only eat some chicken and fish. I won't eat anything fried, or anything that looks greasy or fattening in any way. When I go to the grocery store with my mom all I get is fruit and non fat foods. Can you help me and tell me what I am doing wrong, please?

Answer:

It sounds as though you are having trouble sorting out conflicting feelings about your body. I wonder why you feel fat even though you know you are not fat. How do you feel when your view of your body is different than your mother's or your friends' views? It sounds so frustrating for you to be trying to change your body through diet and exercise, and yet sometimes you feel even more unhappy about how you look. Worse, you keep blaming yourself, believing you must be doing something wrong.

I have responded to your questions with more questions for you to think about. I also suggest that you find someone to talk to about these image issues. A Therapist experienced with eating disorders maybe able to help you address your conflicts about your body. You need to develop a realistic perspective on what is going on with your body and to understand the feelings of being wrong no matter how hard you try. Check http://www.renfrew.org and the Treatment Locator or National Eating Disorder Organization to find an appropriate referral in your area.